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39 Ways to Live, and Not Merely Exist

"The proper function of man is to live - not to exist." -- Jack London

Too often we go through life on autopilot, going through the motions and having each day pass like the one before it.

That's fine, and comfortable, until you have gone through another year without having done anything, without having really lived life.

That's fine, until you have reached old age and look back on life with regrets.

That's fine, until you see your kids go off to college and realize that you missed their childhoods.

It's not fine. If you want to truly live life, to really experience it, to enjoy it to the fullest, instead of barely scraping by and only living a life of existence, then you need to find ways to break free from the mold and drink from life.

What follows is just a list of ideas, obvious ones mostly that you could have thought of yourself, but that I hope are useful reminders. We all need reminders sometimes. If you find this useful, print it out, and start using it. Today.


Love. Perhaps the most important. Fall in love, if you aren't already. If you have, fall in love with your partner all over again. Abandon caution and let your heart be broken. Or love family members, friends, anyone -- it doesn't have to be romantic love. Love all of humanity, one person at a time.

Get outside. Don't let yourself be shut indoors. Go out when it's raining. Walk on the beach. Hike through the woods. Swim in a freezing lake. Bask in the sun. Play sports, or walk barefoot through grass. Pay close attention to nature.

Savor food. Don't just eat your food, but really enjoy it. Feel the texture, the bursts of flavors. Savor every bite. If you limit your intake of sweets, it will make the small treats you give yourself (berries or dark chocolate are my favorites) even more enjoyable. And when you do have them, really, really savor them. Slowly.

Create a morning ritual. Wake early and greet the day. Watch the sun rise. Out loud, tell yourself that you will not waste this day, which is a gift. You will be compassionate to your fellow human beings, and live every moment to its fullest. Stretch or meditate or exercise as part of your ritual. Enjoy some coffee.

Take chances. We often live our lives too cautiously, worried about what might go wrong. Be bold, risk it all. Quit your job and go to business for yourself (plan it out first!), or go up to that girl you've liked for a long time and ask her out. What do you have to lose?

Follow excitement. Try to find the things in life that excite you, and then go after them. Make life one exciting adventure after another (with perhaps some quiet times in between).

Find your passion. Similar to the above tip, this one asks you to find your calling. Make your living by doing the thing you love to do. First, think about what you really love to do. There may be many things. Find out how you can make a living doing it. It may be difficult, but you only live once.

Get out of your cubicle. Do you sit all day in front of computer, shuffling papers and taking phone calls and chatting on the Internet? Don't waste your days like this. Break free from the cubicle environment, and do your work on a laptop, in a coffee shop, or on a boat, or in a log cabin. This may require a change of jobs, or becoming a freelancer. It's worth it.

Turn off the TV. How many hours will we waste away in front of the boob tube? How many hours do we have to live? Do the math, then unplug the TV. Only plug it back in when you have a DVD of a movie you love. Otherwise, keep it off and find other stuff to do. Don't know what to do? Read further.

Pull away from Internet. You're reading something on the Internet right now. And, with the exception of this article, it is just more wasting away of your precious time. You cannot get these minutes back. Unplug the Internet, then get out of your office or house. Right now! And go and do something.

Travel. Sure, you want to travel some day. When you have vacation time, or when you're older. Well, what are you waiting for? Find a way to take a trip, if not this month, then sometime soon. You may need to sell your car or stop your cable bill and stop eating out to do it, but make it happen. You are too young to not see the world. If need be, find a way to make a living by freelancing, then work while you travel. Only work an hour or two a day. Don't check email but once a week. Then use the rest of the time to see the world.

Rediscover what's important. Take an hour and make a list of everything that's important to you. Add to it everything that you want to do in life. Now cut that list down to 4-5 things. Just the most important things in your life. This is your core list. This is what matters. Focus your life on these things. Make time for them.

Eliminate everything else. What's going on in your life that's not on that short list? All that stuff is wasting your time, pulling your attention from what's important. As much as possible, simplify your life by eliminating the stuff that's not on your short list, or minimizing it.

Exercise. Get off the couch and go for a walk. Eventually try running. Or do some push ups and crunches. Or swim or bike or row. Or go for a hike. Whatever you do, get active, and you'll love it. And life will be more alive.

Be positive. Learn to recognize the negative thoughts you have. These are the self-doubts, the criticisms of others, the complaints, the reasons you can't do something. Then stop yourself when you have these thoughts, and replace them with positive thoughts. Solutions. You can do this!

Open your heart. Is your heart a closed bundle of scar tissue? Learn to open it, have it ready to receive love, to give love unconditionally. If you have a problem with this, talk to someone about it. And practice makes perfect.

Kiss in the rain. Seize the moment and be romantic. Raining outside? Grab your lover and give her a passionate kiss. Driving home? Stop the car and pick some wildflowers. Send her a love note. Dress sexy for him.

Face your fears. What are you most afraid of? What is holding you back? Whatever it is, recognize it, and face it. Do what you are most afraid of. Afraid of heights? Go to the tallest building, and look down over the edge. Only by facing our fears can we be free of them.

When you suffer, suffer. Life isn't all about fun and games. Suffering is an inevitable part of life. We lose our jobs. We lose our lovers. We lose our pets. We get physically injured or sick. A loved one becomes sick. A parent dies. Learn to feel the pain intensely, and really grieve. This is a part of life -- really feel the pain. And when you're done, move on, and find joy.

Slow down. Life moves along at such a rapid pace these days. It's not healthy, and it's not conducive to living. Practice doing everything slowly -- everything, from eating to walking to driving to working to reading. Enjoy what you do. Learn to move at a snail's pace.

Touch humanity. Get out of your house and manicured neighborhoods, and find those who live in worse conditions. Meet them, talk to them, understand them. Live among them. Be one of them. Give up your materialistic lifestyle.

Volunteer. Help at homeless soup kitchens. Learn compassion, and learn to help ease the suffering of others. Help the sick, those with disabilities, those who are dying.

Play with children. Children, more than anyone else, know how to live. They experience everything in the moment, fully. When they get hurt, they really cry. When they play, they really have fun. Learn from them, instead of thinking you know so much more than them. Play with them, and learn to be joyful like them.

Talk to old people. There is no one wiser, more experienced, more learned, than those who have lived through life. They can tell you amazing stories. Give you advice on making a marriage last or staying out of debt. Tell you about their regrets, so you can learn from them and avoid the same mistakes. They are the wisdom of our society -- take advantage of their existence while they're still around.

Learn new skills. Constantly improve yourself instead of standing still -- not because you're so imperfect now, but because it is gratifying and satisfying. You should accept yourself as you are, and learn to love who you are, but still try to improve -- if only because the process of improvement is life itself.

Find spirituality. For some, this means finding God or Jesus or Allah or Buddha. For others, this means becoming in tune with the spirits of our ancestors, or with nature. For still others, this just means an inner energy. Whatever spirituality means for you, rediscover it, and its power.

Take mini-retirements. Don't leave the joy of retirement until you are too old to enjoy it. Do it now, while you're young. It makes working that much more worth it. Find ways to take a year off every few years. Save up, sell your home, your possessions, and travel. Live simply, but live, without having to work. Enjoy life, then go back to work and save up enough money to do it again in a couple of years.

Do nothing. Despite the tip above that we should find excitement, there is value in doing nothing as well. Not doing nothing as in reading, or taking a nap, or watching TV, or meditating. Doing nothing as in sitting there, doing nothing. Just learning to be still, in silence, to hear our inner voice, to be in tune with life. Do this daily if possible.

Stop playing video games. They might be fun, but they can take up way too much time. If you spend a lot of time playing online games, or computer solitaire, or Wii or Gameboy or whatever, consider going a week without it. Then find something else to do, outside.

Watch sunsets, daily. One of the most beautiful times of day. Make it a daily ritual to find a good spot to watch the sunset, perhaps having a light dinner while you do so.

Stop reading magazines. They're basically crap. And they waste your time and money. Cancel your subscriptions and walk past them at the news stands. If you have to read something, read a trashy novel or even better, read Dumb Little Man once a day and be done.

Break out from ruts. Do you do things the same way every day? Change it up. Try something new. Take a different route to work. Start your day out differently. Approach work from a new angle. Look at things from new perspectives.

Stop watching the news. It's depressing and useless. If you're a news junky, this may be difficult. I haven't watch TV news or read a newspaper regularly in about two years. It hasn't hurt me a bit. Anything important, my mom tells me about.

Laugh till you cry. Laughing is one of the best ways to live. Tell jokes and laugh your head off. Watch an awesome comedy. Learn to laugh at anything. Roll on the ground laughing. You'll love it.

Lose control. Not only control over yourself, but control over others. It's a bad habit to try to control others -- it will only lead to stress and unhappiness for yourself and those you try to control. Let others live, and live for yourself. And lose control of yourself now and then too.

Cry. Men, especially, tend to hold in our tears, but crying is an amazing release. Cry at sad movies. Cry at a funeral. Cry when you are hurt, or when somebody you love is hurt. It releases these emotions and allows us to cleanse ourselves.

Make an awesome dessert. I like to make warm, soft chocolate cake. But even berries dipped in chocolate, or crepes with ice cream and fruit, or fresh apple pie, or homemade chocolate chip cookies or brownies, are great. This isn't an every day thing, but an occasional treat thing. But it's wonderful.

Try something new, every week. Ask yourself: "What new thing shall I try this week?" Then be sure to do it. You don't have to learn a new language in one week, but seek new experiences. Give it a try. You might decide you want to keep it in your life.

Be in the moment. Instead of thinking about things you need to do, or things that have happened to you, or worrying or planning or regretting, think about what you are doing, right now. What is around you? What smells and sounds and sights and feelings are you experiencing? Learn to do this as much as possible through meditation, but also through bringing your focus back to the present as much as you can in everything you do.
Written on 6/19/2007 by Leo Babauta, a writer, a runner and a vegetarian, and the owner of Zen Habits. This article was republished on 6/28/09. Photo Credit: hunters.green




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0 Vote up Vote down Celestine Chua · 25 weeks ago

I haven't read this post by Leo before, so it's nice that this 2007 post was republished for new readers. A lot of the points here are really powerful - especially # 1. I don't have a boyfriend currently and I'm looking forward to when I find the right guy. In the meantime, I'll continue to live life to the rullest via the other 38 ways :)

CelestineChua.com - Be Your Best Self. Live Your Best Life
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1 reply · active 9 weeks ago
0 Vote up Vote down mommaw · 25 weeks ago

It's obvious to me, as a grandmother, that you have no children or others dependent upon you for their financial, emotional, or spirtual well-being. It will be interesting to see how your suggestions change when putting food on the table and providing educational opportunities, medical care, and a supportive home environment take priority over "living in the moment." You've offered up a pretty dream, but not a very practical one.
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4 replies · active 5 weeks ago
0 Vote up Vote down Home · 24 weeks ago

Very good post/blog/whatever it is, it's very good. I have been doing some of these lately, inadvertently. Granted, as mommaw points out, some of them aren't practical for those of us with responsibilities, however, many are free and simply a matter of choosing priorities.
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0 replies · active less than 1 minute ago
0 Vote up Vote down Debra · 24 weeks ago

I disagree about reading magazines. I need regular health and fitness encouragement and reinforcement, and I can get this monthly through good magazines like "Experience Life".
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1 reply · active 2 weeks ago
0 Vote up Vote down Jason · 24 weeks ago

I strongly disagree with 33. Staying informed about national/global events is not "useless".
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5 replies · active 4 weeks ago
0 Vote up Vote down john · 24 weeks ago

liberal crap. go be a homeless person and your life has meaning? let's see you'll get to spend plenty of time outside.. no internet to speak of. Talk to plenty of other older people. You'll learn new skills, like how to open a tin can by hand. You'll laugh, cry, suffer and lose control.. probably on the way to jail. But hey, if that's living to you.. go for it, don't ask me to support your family.
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2 replies · active 6 weeks ago
0 Vote up Vote down Mindy · 24 weeks ago

Sheesh...some people may need to lighten up a bit...this doesn't have to be taken so literally. Apply these suggestions (and remember, they are only suggestions, someone's opinion) to your life in a way that works for you. I enjoyed reading this. I hope it inspires more people to remember what's important. Not all 39 of these are gonna work for everyone. But I definitely think everyone could find at least ONE of these things to apply to their life.
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0 Vote up Vote down Brian · 24 weeks ago

I went to college and majored in marketing. Got a great job in advertising and worked it a couple years. Over time I realized it was a souless evil industry that was really hurting me. So I decided to make a change and went to culinary school to follow my passion. So I set off into my brave new world. I knew that professional kitchens provided no beneftis, no vacation, and you were expected to show up sick short of death.
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0 Vote up Vote down Brian · 24 weeks ago

But I was following my dream. I and all of my friends I might add are unemployed because people are not coming to restaurants because of fears of lack of employment . When I say ALL of my friends, I mean ALL OF MY FRIENDS. I can and have made that light dinner over a sunset.... in a 100 degree kitchen.... I eat awesome desserts on a regular basis (my girlfriend went to the same school as me as a baker). But I hate to break it to you, if you are scraping by praying you don't get sick and that the place you are working at doesn't get shut down so that you and your loved one can buy grocerys for the next week.... all the raindrops, rainbows, grass beneath your feet, and meditation isn't gonna matter. If you are unhappy ask yourself why. But don't just make a change cause you think that facing your fears is a good idea.... There are always consequences
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2 replies · active 22 weeks ago
0 Vote up Vote down div2000 · 24 weeks ago

I really enjoy your post. LoL at swim in a freezing lake. You provided deep insight onto things that really matter in life. Thanks for sharing.
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0 replies · active less than 1 minute ago
+1 Vote up Vote down Akhil Sasidharan 41p · 24 weeks ago

I'm sure this would change my life!
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0 replies · active 24 weeks ago
0 Vote up Vote down Joe · 24 weeks ago

This was mostly good :) defiinatly gonna try some of these, the list of 5 things seems like a good idea
Cheers
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0 Vote up Vote down Kjell · 23 weeks ago

I'd like to share a personal story. It's beyond pathetic, but it's true.

I'm born in Europe, moved to the United States when I was about four or five. (Keep forgetting.) Lived there until about nine years ago. I moved back to Europe because school wouldn't cost me an arm and a leg. :)

Well, things happened and I got a girl pregnant. We got married, had the child and soon divorced. (Long story there...) I don't regret that, as my child is probably one of the biggest joys I've had in my life. :)

I've been in and out of work for various reasons, some because of health, the others because I didn't know what I was doing. (I'm not going to lie.)

I've not been on a vacation since 1997 with my grandparents, I'm stuck inside doing the same crap over and over again, wake up, eat, watch some TV, sit on the net, sleep and then repeat. This is no existence and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

I recently got out and got semi-active in a sport. It's not something I can do all the time, but I got overjoyed that I was out in a group doing _something_ and not just sitting inside wishing I had a life.

Although, I'm now losing interest for that particular sport, I'm slowly growing more keen on the idea and going out and doing something, anything.

These tips by Leo Baubata will help. (Thanks)

I don't know why my life took a 180 like it did. I'm just not "European" I guess to live a happy and active life here. I'd go back to the U.S. but having a kid here makes that impossible.

Just needed to let it out. Thanks for reading. :)
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0 Vote up Vote down Rafi Mahabbat · 23 weeks ago

Really nice post.Opened up my eyes.Wonderful insight and depth.People who didn't like about some parts, can skip those as the author didn't instruct to do all these things to live life.It is just a mere guideline and an opportunity to think what we are missing.The ones that suits us the best, we should choose those ones and do it.Not every thing is practical, but still, as said before, this steps are just suggestions and you should think deeply to understand what are the purpose of these actions. For example, if a guy gets depressed watching news of hunger and murder(which are pretty abundant these days), then it is a good idea for him to stay off the news for his own betterment of life and concentration at work.I hope the article would be accepted to all for its simplicity and purpose.
Cheers.
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0 Vote up Vote down Kay · 22 weeks ago

I would add, #21 - Stop telling people how to live their lives and focus on your own.
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1 reply · active 17 weeks ago
0 Vote up Vote down enthusiasticjen · 22 weeks ago

Wow, I love the list. It is so inspiring even by just reading the title “Ways to live and not only Exist” !!! I can start doing it right away like love, break out from ruts and touch the humanity .Thanks for sharing.
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0 Vote up Vote down Camilla · 22 weeks ago

Thanks for reminding me about #38. I've been wanting to do that, but got back to troubleshooting mode somehow - time to change that.
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0 Vote up Vote down Kate · 22 weeks ago

Wow - people sure are defensive! It would obviously be difficult to do all 39 of these things...but they are suggestions on ways to live with more meaning - not a blueprint. Take it easy people!
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0 Vote up Vote down amethyst · 22 weeks ago

I thought this list was so inspiring... I would add #39 "don't read folks comments following the post" cause you're back in crapland... reading all these comments was awful... readers... use what you like and leave the rest.. no need to trash what you don't find personally inspiring
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0 Vote up Vote down Anon · 19 weeks ago

Live
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0 Vote up Vote down Daryl · 18 weeks ago

This list defently made me think, and anyone can take something from it as it is only a list of ideas.
I think a really important one could be added, and thats just to smile. no matter now bad life gets, no matter where you are or what your doing you can pull a smile, remeber its not the end of the world.

Have a nice day :)
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0 Vote up Vote down WhateverLifeIsAbout · 17 weeks ago

Propaganda. It does not apply for all ppl.
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0 replies · active less than 1 minute ago
0 Vote up Vote down Tampa Field Guide · 17 weeks ago

A great list. Nice ideas.... now if only I can implement them. Thank you!
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0 replies · active less than 1 minute ago
0 Vote up Vote down NagaCuun · 16 weeks ago

This is a very impractical list. Who can do all this stuff and still live in a normal society. This is just a dream.
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+1 Vote up Vote down Mat Cendana 45p · 15 weeks ago

Yes. it's super tough to implement all of these. Impractical and just a dream? Perhaps. But why give up after reading and thinking about it for at most 30 minutes only? Isn't our life the most precious of all, which by extension requires us to TRY our best to make it great?
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0 replies · active 15 weeks ago
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39 Ways to Live, and Not Merely Exist
2009-06-28T04:18:00-05:00
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